Is Motherhood a Woman’s Highest Calling?
What would you say if I told you that your worth and your value as a woman do not depend on your being a mom? Would you believe me? If you're anything like I was for several years, you may struggle to believe this. But it is true!
I went through a years-long phase of legalism as a teen, a phase in which I believed that a woman's entire purpose was summed up in her fulfilling the roles of wife, mother, and homemaker. What I didn't realize at the time was that in saying such a thing, I wasn't only leaving out the countless amazing women out there who never get married or never have children, depriving them in my mind of ever being able to do great things for God. I was also heaping a heavy burden on the shoulders of mamas everywhere, inadvertently encouraging them to base their identity and find their worth in what kind of mothers they were. Clearly, this notion was a lose-lose situation for all of us as women!
I believed it for a long time, but I don't any longer - I no longer believe that motherhood is a woman's highest calling. Motherhood is sacred, yes. It is valuable, life-changing, world-altering, work of eternal impact and importance. Absolutely! But it is not a woman's highest calling. It is not all you're good for or the sole reason for which you were put on this earth.
I believe this is important for us as moms to understand, because the alternative is that we begin to base our entire identity in motherhood. When we do this, we can get by okay on the good days when we feel like we are really nailing this mothering thing. But on the bad days when our kids won't listen, we can't keep a clean house for anything, and our temper is raging, suddenly we're in the depths of despair over what terrible moms we believe ourselves to be. If you refuse, however, to find your identity in motherhood but instead base your identity on who you are in Christ and find your highest calling in being a Christ-follower, then you can easily jump off that roller coaster of emotions.
A Woman's True Highest Calling
I touched on it briefly above, but if motherhood is not a woman's highest calling, then what is? I believe that what we find in the Word is that a woman's highest calling is actually the same as a man's, and it is two-fold: to be an image bearer of God (Genesis 1:26-28) and to be an ambassador of Christ (2 Corinthians 5:20), daily seeking to fulfill the Great Commission (Matthew 28:18-20).
This is a beautiful thing for multiple reasons. For one, we are able to be comforted by the fact that because our highest calling is to bear God's image to the world as His ambassadors, this means that our identity is safely tucked away not in who we are on our own or in what we do, but rather in who Christ has made us to be and what He has already accomplished on our behalf. We can rest. We can breathe. We can drink in the goodness of His grace and the beautiful implications of His gospel.
Secondly, this realization means that every Christ-follower everywhere can live out their ultimate highest calling, whether they are married, single, parents, childless, young, or old.
And, finally, this is a beautiful thing because it is actually our true ultimate highest calling of being Great Commission workers to the glory of God which is what then infuses into motherhood its true sense of importance and impact, for our children are our little disciples, little souls entrusted into our care to raise for the glory of God and good of others. Motherhood, then, is an outworking of our ultimate highest calling. And that is a beautiful thing to behold!
Theology is For You!
This is why I am so passionate about encouraging and equipping women to grow in their understanding of theology and their knowledge of Scripture. Because the reality is that whether you are a mama or not, whether your children are babies or you already have an empty nest, in order to be an ambassador for Christ, you have to know your theology!
In order to be a godly woman, you need to know theology.
In order to be a godly wife, you need to know theology.
In order to be a godly mama, you need to know theology.
In order to be a godly co-worker, employee, or employer, you need to know theology.
And the list goes on. The Word of God is what equips us for the good works we seek to perform on a day-to-day basis (2 Timothy 3:16-17), both in our mothering and elsewhere. And it is what comforts us when we begin to believe the lie that our identity, worth, and value are to be summed up in what kind of mamas we are.
The truth, sweet friend, is that thanks to the gloriously good news of the gospel, God the Father already views you as possessing the righteousness of Christ the Son as your own. Because of this, when the going gets tough, when you begin to believe lies about yourself, your children, or your mothering, you can turn to the Word for the refreshing, freeing truth you need. It's all in there for you, Mama. And it is yours for the taking!
Rebekah Hargraves
Rebekah Hargraves is a wife, mama of two littles, blogger, podcaster, and author whose passion is to edify, equip, and encourage women in their journey of Biblical womanhood, particularly with an emphasis on the gospel and its implications for everyday life. Rebekah's first book, "Lies Moms Believe (And How the Gospel Refutes Them)" released last fall, and the "Lies Moms Believe" Companion Bible Study came out March 30, 2018. You can find Rebekah on her website, Hargraves Home and Hearth, on Instagram, or on iTunes via The Home and Hearth podcast.